Open Letter to Ty and Brynlee's Dad

Posted and copied from One Mom's Battle

Dear Ty and Brynlee’s Dad - 

Right now, you hold the power. Maybe that was your goal all along? Maybe you were as shocked as the rest of us when Judge Derek Pullan handed down a ruling that defied logic and sent shockwaves around the world?

While I know it can be a dangerous path, I am often guilty of giving people the benefit of the doubt to my own detriment. I have seen enough in this case that prevents me from giving you the benefit of the doubt but for purposes of this conversation, let’s say you are completely innocent of everything that has been said about you. 

If in fact you are a parent who has been falsely accused, and rejected by your children through no fault of your own, it’s a very difficult situation. Ty and Brynlee have very strong opinions and feelings that warrant consideration - and now, they have barricaded themselves in a bedroom for almost 3 months.

I am a parent to a 15-year-old and a 17-year-old. If my children rejected me, or had been turned against me, my heart would be broken and I would be utterly destroyed. If I were in your shoes, I would be forced to acknowledge that their feelings (warranted or not) were so strong that they drilled a hole through a wall and physically isolated themselves from the world. I would step back, honor their feelings, and remove myself from the equation. It would probably be the most difficult decision of my life, but I would have to trust and have faith that they would come back if the rejection was unwarranted. My faith would be that the original bond I created with them would stand the test of time. 

I would never continue this standoff, which is causing such obvious fear, distress and anxiety.  Given their ages, I would let them have a voice, and I would hand the reins back over. I would put my children first, above my own pain, self interest and heart break.

But on the other hand, I subscribe to the belief that children don’t lie about these things.

I believe in listening to their voices — and amplifying their voices. I believe Ty and Brynlee. I believe the DCSF reports that I’ve seen with my own eyes. I personally know how hard it is to get a single substantiated report of abuse from DCSF but you have several substantiated reports that are listed as “chronic and severe.” To me, this speaks volumes. 

Regardless of the facts and what I believe to be true; you hold the reins. The family court system failed these children. I don’t believe this is Michelle Jones or Daniel Eyre’s first rodeo, and I believe they were placed on this case as a legal strategy - to the detriment of the children.

I believe there are many others who have been affected by these same players. I hope the ripples and the waves of exposure from the Propublica feature are strong and relentless.

You have benefited from what I believe to be a ring of collusion, people who are so driven by the confirmation bias of “alienation” that they are financially incentivized to give you the benefit of the doubt. To me, that is shameful. When it comes to children, we should always err on the side of caution - but for many professionals in the system, they are clouded by financial gain.

You have the power to end all of this: please do the right thing.

Please allow these children to go free.

We all agree that they need to be back in school, enjoying the sunshine, and hanging out with their friends and family. On Monday morning, you have the power to ask your attorney to file an ex parte motion, and reverse the insanity of Judge Pullan’s orders. You have the opportunity to do the right thing.

The reality is, the whole world is watching. These children have built an army and we will continue to advocate for their safety and well-being. This case has garnered the attention of the top advocates across the country - we all believe these children, and we will continue to fight for their safety. We aren't going away, we are here to stay and if these children are sent into a reunification camp, or are removed from their home, we will get even louder. The spotlight will get even brighter.

Within a handful of years, these children will age out of the system, and they will be forces for change. Their voices will be heard and honored. Your current actions hold great power. If you listen to these children and respect their wishes, there may be a chance to build a future relationship. If you don't, I can guarantee you that you will destroy any chance of knowing your children as adults.

On behalf of Ty and Brynlee, and all children around the world who simply want to be heard, set them free.

You have the power to do that.

I implore you to do the right thing.


Tina Swithin